Self-licking Or Not?

Jakhon tor mai te hat bolai aar chose…’..Kusum lajja peye chup kare thake..Ram babu or Mai tipte tipte balen ‘ki re bol…kemon lage…tepon khete aar gude bara nite…”Aai bale Kusum ke aktu sariye Kusum ar hate nijer bara ta dhariye den…’kemon re ata tor dada der theke bhalo??’..‘Bardar to ar theke chhoto kitu chhordar ta aro chhoto thik jeno amar 2 angul ar mato lamba aar mota…aar aar..’..’ki holo bol…’Ram babu jore jore Kusum ar mai tepen gale ghare kapale thothe aker aker par ak chhumu khan…‘Aar chhorda r ta khoob taratri bhater faner mato jal ber kare dey..’…Kusum Ram babur bara ta chatkate chatkate bale…’apnar na to dekhchhi kach kalar mato… Jemon mota temon lamba aar baro..’…‘Nibi naki re amar ta tor gude…’..aai bale Ram babu Kusum ke sam ne pa fak kare dar kariye den..aar Kusum ar Bra hook khule frock ar tala diye hat dhukiye mai tipte lagen..aar arek hater angul pantir pas diye Kusum ar guder futote dhukiye Kusum ke angul choda korte thaken…Kachhe tene ane Kusum ar gale jibh. . it has to end here ... I’ve already let it get out of hand, and I’m sorry...”“Mom,” he interrupted, “don’t. Don’t say that, and don’t feel that. It was beautiful, you have to admit. You feel it, too. I know you do. Don’t worry about what society thinks is right or wrong ... trust your feelings. Trust me.”I sighed, and cried some more. Once again, it felt good to just lay there in his lap and let him hold me. I tried to think about what he was saying. I knew he was just saying it because he wanted me. That didn’t make it right. But I felt for him. I wanted to make him happy. But I couldn’t ... I just couldn’t. I knew what was right, and what was wrong.We talked, into the night. I tried to make him understand, and I think he did understand, but I think he just wanted what he wanted even more. He tried make me come around to his point of view, and he was very persuasive. I felt, more and more, an attraction to what he was saying. To just give up, and drown myself in his love. I hate to.
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